Friday, April 17, 2015
13 Non-Political Reasons Hillary Clinton Could Win The White House
On April 12th, Hillary Clinton officially announced her 2016 Presidential Bid. If successful, she'll demolish one of the longest-standing glass ceilings in history. Here, in no particular order, are some reasons she can pull it off.
She puts hot sauce on everything, even salad.
Her love of hot sauce is possibly one of her strongest personal attributes. Forget candidates you'd have a beer with--I want a candidate who can pound a dozen Hot As Hell Wings without shedding a tear. Also hot sauce is red, which should help her in the South.
She once out-drank John McCain.
One time, in Estonia, the two senators sat down at a restaurant and took shots of vodka. Clinton won the game with four. SO we know this lady can hold her liquor, and is thusly capable of handling Russia.
She's a Cubs fan.
She was born in Chicago, after all. She even threw out the first pitch of the Chicago Cubs’ 1994 baseball season. “Being a Cubs fan prepares you for life, and for Washington," she said after becoming First Lady. Both of which can be awfully disheartening.
She probably, definitely, smoked pot.
I mean, look at Bill's hair. They're high as sh*t in this picture. Hillary's also said--on the record--that's she's open to federal legalization of marijuana. Which will probably go over well with the majority of American voters who feel the same.
She's Leslie Knope in real life.
And since we can't vote for Leslie, Hill might be the next best thing. As a child, she would have imaginary conversations with idols such as Eleanor Roosevelt. This continued into adulthood. The ever-wise Eleanor "usually respond[ed] by telling me to buck up or at least to grow skin as thick as a rhinoceros," Clinton reportedly said in a biography written by Sally Bedell Smith.
She has skin as thick as a rhinoceros.
Hillary has been in politics--a career path that's particularly tough for women--for a long time. Over the years she's been criticized for everything from her choice of pantsuit to her current hairstyle (things that have nothing to do with politics or leadership, I might add). Throughout it all, she gave zero f*cks. In a time when the media tends to be OUT OF CONTROL and WAY OFF POINT, this is a rare skill.
She can absolutely ROCK a pantsuit.
If you're gonna be POTUS, you've got to look the part, and Americans expect their Commander-In-Chief to wear a suit. Pick a color, any color. Hillary was born to wear the blazer and slacks.
She's not interested in taking her cues from a man.
She attends a separate church from her husband. Born and raised a Methodist, she didn't care to abandon her roots when she married Bill, a Southern Baptist. When it comes to the things she's passionate about, Hillary's not afraid to go it alone. Something that comes in mighty handy when you're making decisions for an entire country.
She's not afraid to get her hands dirty.
During the summer of 1969, Clinton worked her way across Alaska, first washing dishes in Mount McKinley National Park, then gutting salmon in a fish-processing cannery in Valdez. Oh wait, what kind of dirt did you think I was talking about?
She knows what it's like to be the breadwinner.
In 2013, the Pew Research Center found that four in 10 American households with children under age 18 now include a mother who is either the sole or primary earner for her family. And Hillary's been there (albeit pulling a much bigger check than most of us). In 1991, Hillary cashed over $188,000 worth of paychecks as a lawyer at a private firm, while Bill made considerably less in government. Twice -- in 1988 and 1991 -- the National Law Journal noted her among the 100 most influential lawyers in America.
She survived periods, childbirth, AND menopause.
Old men like to say a women can't handle the stress of Presidency. These old men have never endured something so heinous and painful as cramps, a human exiting their body, and cold sweats in the middle of international negotiations. According to exit polls 53 percent of the voters in the 2012 elections were women—more than one out of every two voters across the country. Just sayin': game recognizes game.
She's a Grandma with a world-famous chocolate-chip cookie recipe.
In 2007, Good Housekeeping published Hillary's personal cookie recipe: a treat little Charlotte is sure to eat many times while Grandma regales her with tales of her time in office.
She knows what it's like to be excluded because she's a woman.
At the age of 27, she tried to become a U.S. Marine. "You're too old, you can't see and you're a woman," she recalled the recruiter telling her. Because having a vagina is a good reason to keep someone from serving their country.
She puts hot sauce on everything, even salad.
Her love of hot sauce is possibly one of her strongest personal attributes. Forget candidates you'd have a beer with--I want a candidate who can pound a dozen Hot As Hell Wings without shedding a tear. Also hot sauce is red, which should help her in the South.
She once out-drank John McCain.
One time, in Estonia, the two senators sat down at a restaurant and took shots of vodka. Clinton won the game with four. SO we know this lady can hold her liquor, and is thusly capable of handling Russia.
She's a Cubs fan.
She was born in Chicago, after all. She even threw out the first pitch of the Chicago Cubs’ 1994 baseball season. “Being a Cubs fan prepares you for life, and for Washington," she said after becoming First Lady. Both of which can be awfully disheartening.
She probably, definitely, smoked pot.
I mean, look at Bill's hair. They're high as sh*t in this picture. Hillary's also said--on the record--that's she's open to federal legalization of marijuana. Which will probably go over well with the majority of American voters who feel the same.
She's Leslie Knope in real life.
And since we can't vote for Leslie, Hill might be the next best thing. As a child, she would have imaginary conversations with idols such as Eleanor Roosevelt. This continued into adulthood. The ever-wise Eleanor "usually respond[ed] by telling me to buck up or at least to grow skin as thick as a rhinoceros," Clinton reportedly said in a biography written by Sally Bedell Smith.
She has skin as thick as a rhinoceros.
Hillary has been in politics--a career path that's particularly tough for women--for a long time. Over the years she's been criticized for everything from her choice of pantsuit to her current hairstyle (things that have nothing to do with politics or leadership, I might add). Throughout it all, she gave zero f*cks. In a time when the media tends to be OUT OF CONTROL and WAY OFF POINT, this is a rare skill.
She can absolutely ROCK a pantsuit.
If you're gonna be POTUS, you've got to look the part, and Americans expect their Commander-In-Chief to wear a suit. Pick a color, any color. Hillary was born to wear the blazer and slacks.
She's not interested in taking her cues from a man.
She attends a separate church from her husband. Born and raised a Methodist, she didn't care to abandon her roots when she married Bill, a Southern Baptist. When it comes to the things she's passionate about, Hillary's not afraid to go it alone. Something that comes in mighty handy when you're making decisions for an entire country.
She's not afraid to get her hands dirty.
During the summer of 1969, Clinton worked her way across Alaska, first washing dishes in Mount McKinley National Park, then gutting salmon in a fish-processing cannery in Valdez. Oh wait, what kind of dirt did you think I was talking about?
She knows what it's like to be the breadwinner.
In 2013, the Pew Research Center found that four in 10 American households with children under age 18 now include a mother who is either the sole or primary earner for her family. And Hillary's been there (albeit pulling a much bigger check than most of us). In 1991, Hillary cashed over $188,000 worth of paychecks as a lawyer at a private firm, while Bill made considerably less in government. Twice -- in 1988 and 1991 -- the National Law Journal noted her among the 100 most influential lawyers in America.
She survived periods, childbirth, AND menopause.
Old men like to say a women can't handle the stress of Presidency. These old men have never endured something so heinous and painful as cramps, a human exiting their body, and cold sweats in the middle of international negotiations. According to exit polls 53 percent of the voters in the 2012 elections were women—more than one out of every two voters across the country. Just sayin': game recognizes game.
She's a Grandma with a world-famous chocolate-chip cookie recipe.
In 2007, Good Housekeeping published Hillary's personal cookie recipe: a treat little Charlotte is sure to eat many times while Grandma regales her with tales of her time in office.
She knows what it's like to be excluded because she's a woman.
At the age of 27, she tried to become a U.S. Marine. "You're too old, you can't see and you're a woman," she recalled the recruiter telling her. Because having a vagina is a good reason to keep someone from serving their country.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments
(
Atom
)
No comments :
Post a Comment